Enjoyment, Satisfaction and Peace

Back in November I had my first visit with my therapist.  She asked me what I enjoy doing, and I just stared at her for what felt like 5 minutes.  Feeling defeated I said, "I don't know."  Since that visit 7 1/2 months ago, I've been trying to figure out what I enjoy and what makes me feel happy, excited, positive, hopeful, etc.  A few of the things on my list are things I've never tried, but sound like so much fun to me.  I don't know why I felt compelled to share it on my blog, but I got excited thinking about making a list on my blog for people to see.  Perhaps it's so that I can share with others what I enjoy doing.  So often, we talk about controversial things online, maybe it'd be refreshing to read something different for once.  I don't even know if people read my blog anymore, but here goes.

What I enjoy

• The smell of dirt

• The smell of rain

• The mountains
• Crisp cool autumn air
• Colorful autumn leaves

• Soft music.  Here are just a few of my favorites lately.  
• Hem
• Ingrid Michaelson
• Rosie Thomas
• Priscilla Ann
• Peter Bradley Adams
• The Peasall Sisters
• Paul Cardall
• Vocal Point's "Lead Thou Me On" album
• Breezy open windows
• Making myself pretty (hair, nails, makeup)
• Checking off lists, even if it is for simple things.  I think I like to see what I'm doing each day.  It gives me perspective.
• Writing.  Reflective writing on my life, how I feel God blesses me and just lists of gratitude.  It's refreshing and most importantly, it's positive and real.  Even when I write of sadness, anger, etc., If I think and write long enough, I can turn it into something positive and hopeful.  This is one of the things that has been most calming and helpful for both Brian and I as we learn how to live with depression.
• Consistency.  I like when I wake up at the same time every day, pray, study, cook and eat dinner at the same time, etc.
• Exercise. I love how it feels to exercise!  It is especially pleasant with music.  Perhaps my favorite part is stretching afterward while listening to soft music enjoying the "runner's high" and deep deep breaths.  
• Mowing lawn
• Swimming laps
• Floral arranging

• Volleyball.  I love playing volleyball soooooooooooooooooooo much.  It seriously makes me feel so so happy.  There is something about making that perfect pass to the setter or slamming a ball as hard as you can into the ground or somebody's face.  I absolutely enjoy playing volleyball.
• Waking up before my kids and being completely alone with no noise, and nobody to answer to.
• Sunrises and sunsets
• Green farmland
• Gardening
• The sound of birds chirping on a quiet morning (not when I'm trying to sleep in though.)
• Playing sports.  I'd love to learn how to play soccer and join a city league.
• Family water fights
• Colors!  I love colors so much.  I love nature with all of it's beauty, I love to see pops of color in nature, home decor, jewelry, nails, clothing, etc.
• Creating!  I love to create.  I'm not much of a fan of sewing.  I think that's because I don't really know what I am doing.  I do love to take parts and pieces of something and turn it into something new, refreshing and awesome.  I don't care if it's my idea or something I found online, I just like to make something out of nothing.
• Doing something hard!  When I do something that is hard, and I make it through the tough part, I feel so powerful, excited and hopeful.  
• Hiking and seeing beauty.  I'd love to try trail running sometime!

• Cold water on a hot hot day.  I love taking cold showers, washing dishes in hot water and then washing my hands 2 or 3 times in cold water afterward.  I love taking my shoes off on a hike and putting my feet in the cold streams and rivers.

• Decorating
• Dates with Brian
• Milkshakes.  This is one of those desserts I will always love and struggle with turning one down.
• Dates with my kids (one at a time)
• I like to ride bikes
• Writing blog posts, especially when I post pictures.
• Raking leaves
• Skiing
• Snowshoeing
• Smiles and laughs.  There is something special about seeing a real and genuine smile and hearing somebody laugh a nice real laugh.  It's something I'm working on. 

• Making somebody else smile or laugh.  I love to build others up.  I especially love to build children and teens up in front of their parents.  It's good to feel special and appreciated.
• Playing the piano.  I'm not very good and I only play once a year or so, but when I play the piano, I feel so happy inside.  I especially like to play church music that touches my soul. Someday, we'll own a piano.   
• Rainbows

Things I would love to try.

• Mountain biking sounds like so much fun.  
• Singing.  I like to sing, but I'm not very good at it.  I'd love to learn how to sing.
• Shooting.  I would like to shoot a gun sometime.
• Painting and drawing.  When I sit down with the kids to paint or draw, it feels soooo therapeutic.  I'd love to take a class.

• Photography.  Of all the things that I want to try, this is the one I want to try the most and here is why.  I love color.  When I go on hikes, I always look for pops of color.  I would love to learn how to take good pictures of nature.  I love nature, I love color, I love creating.  I feel like that is one of the best ways to create something.  Brian loves looking for new birds.  How soothing and fun it would be for both of us to find a babysitter once in a while, drive up the mountains, go to the lake, or even a nature park.  We could both explore and do something that feels soothing to our souls in the peace and quiet of God's creations!